Alpha's Remorse After Her Death (Amber and Julian) novel Chapter 212

Chapter 212

If I closed my eyes and truly pushed through the fog in my mind, I could sense Amber enough to know she was there, but I couldn’t discem her feelings. If something happened to her, I wouldn’t be able to tell.

Some worry bubbled up inside of me, remembering the time she had been abducted and how quickly I had found her because of our bond. Yet even that concern was muted thanks to the medicine.

I supposed, it was working. I didn’t feel possessive or aggressive. But the alternative? This nothing feeling

I hated it.

With Alice, I tried to act normal, taking her to see the animals. She liked the elephants best, especially because there was a baby who was very cute, playing in the puddles while flinging his trunk around.

But the truth was, being normal was an act. If I let myself sit still, I simply blanked out. To stay present, meant effort. By midmorning, I was exhausted but still pushing through, for Alice and for myself.

Maybe I could stop the medicine. If I dumped the pills down the toilet, maybe I could pretend that I was still taking them. Would Amber notice?

I wasn’t sure, not even at the end of the day, when Amber joined us. She seemed tired, but didn’t complain so I didn’t push. By now, I was so exhausted of fighting the medicine that I was kind of letting it win so

that I could have some relief.

I sat on the couch in the living room staring at the television, though I couldn’t say what was actually on.

I wasn’t truly watching it, just looking, while I zoned out into nothing.

“Julian?” Amber asked, stepping in my line of sight. With her tone of voice, it was clear this wasn’t the first time she had said my name.

Blinking, I forced myself to look up at her.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

“I’m fine,” I said. That was true, wasn’t it? I wasn’t good or bad. Fine felt right.

She frowned a little. “Is it the medicine?”

Yes. “I don’t know what you mean,” I lied. She wanted me to take this medicine, and I promised I would. She didn’t need to worry herself about what else I was going through.

“Okay…” she seemed uncertain, but as I continued to stare without saying anything, she eventually walked away. I continued to stare at the television until it was late enough for me to go to bed.

I didn’t sleep, but I did something similar, with my eyes open. I just stared at the ceiling until the morning

came.

Chapter 212

Amber’s POV

+15 BONUS

Something was definitely going on with Julian, and I suspected it was that medicine. I had been in a horrible mood last night after dealing with Mary. Normally he would notice and offer comfort or

protection.

But he didn’t even seem to notice my mood, and when I tried to talk to him, he spaced out.

I didn’t like this change in him. Maybe the medicine was a mistake after all.

On my way to the clinic, I resolved to look into the side effects of that medicine. Maybe I could adjust the dose or find something that suited him better.

Yet, before I could even get past the front desk, Gail stopped me and handed me an envelope.

“This was special delivered this morning,” she said.

I looked down at it and realized at once what it was.

The DNA test results.