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Chapter 239 Love can hurt
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Chapter 239 Love can hurt
Mia’s POV
I sat in the dimly lit car, staring at him–the man who had been a constant presence in our lives for the past four
years.
Steady. Reliable. Full of love.
These were qualities Kyle had never possessed, at least not in the way Thomas offered them. Thomas had given me everything I had ever imagined about the security of love, and I had been greedily indulging in it.
If my
relationship with Thomas were to become like the one I had with Kyle–filled with insecurity, chaos, and unbearable pain–would I still love Thomas?
The thought made my stomach clench with shame. Am I a shameless person? I dared not face these thoughts.
“Mia,” Thomas said again, his voice gentle but insistent. “Please. Talk to me.”
I looked at him. His kind brown eyes were creased with concern, his hand reaching across the console toward mine. This was Thomas. The man who had held my hair back when I had morning sickness during those early days with the twins. Who had taught Alexander and Ethan how to tie their shoes with infinite patience. Who had never once made me feel like I wasn’t enough.
“I’m feeling a bit tired today, Thomas,” I said finally, the words coming out more distant than I intended. “Let me think about it. I don’t want to say something that might hurt you. I need some time.”
His face fell slightly, but he nodded. “Of course. Whatever you need.”
He leaned across the console and kissed me, soft and familiar. I didn’t refuse, but I didn’t respond either. I just sat there, letting him kiss me.
When he pulled back, his eyes searched mine. “Mia-”
“I should get them upstairs,” I said, glancing back at the sleeping twins. “They’ll be cranky tomorrow if they don’t get proper sleep in their own beds,”
I don’t want to hurt Thomas; I’m certain of that. But it seems that when a relationship makes me feel insecure, I instinctively want to run away. I don’t want more people like Taylor in life.
my
Thomas helped me carry the boys upstairs, both of us moving quietly through the apartment so we wouldn’t wake them. He lingered in the doorway.
“I’ll call you tomorrow?” he asked softly.
“Sure,” I replied, not meeting his eyes. “Tomorrow.”
After he left, I stood in the twins‘ doorway for a long time, watching them sleep. Alexander had kicked off his
covers already, sprawled across his bed like a starfish. Ethan was curled up in a tight ball, his hand clutching the stuffed elephant Nate had given him years ago.
They were my anchor.
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Chapter 239 Love can hurt
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I took a day off from work the next morning, calling Camille to reschedule my meetings. What happened. yesterday drained every ounce of my strength, and I needed a day to rest.
The twins were thrilled to have me home on a Tuesday, treating it like an unexpected holiday. We had pancakes for lunch and built a fort out of couch cushions that took up half the living room,
“Bath time, monsters,” 1 announced, chasing the twins down the hallway as they shrieked with laughter.
“Can we have bubbles?” Alexander asked, already pulling off his dinosaur t–shirt.
“Extra bubbles,” I promised. “And maybe we can have a water fight.”
“Yes!” Ethan cheered, pumping his tiny fist in the air.
1 filled the tub with warm water and an obscene amount of bubble bath, the kind that turned the water into a cloud of sweet–smelling foam. The twins climbed in, immediately starting their own version of a naval battle with their plastic boats and rubber ducks.
“Mama, get in too!” Alexander demanded, splashing water toward me.
“I’m not wearing a bathing suit,” I protested, but I was already rolling up my sleeves,
“So? You’re our mama!” Ethan giggled. “Mamas don’t need bathing suits!”
Before I knew it, I was sitting on the edge of the tub with my feet in the water, using a plastic cup to pour water over their heads while they squealed with delight. They took turns washing my arms with their washcloths, declaring me “squeaky clean” with great authority.
“Mama, what’s this?” Ethan asked suddenly, his small fingers tracing the faint scar on my lower abdomen where my C–section had been.
I looked down, realizing my shirt had ridden up. “That’s where you and Alexander came from,” I said softly.” When you were born, the doctors had to make a little door to help you out.”
“We came from there?” Alexander asked, eyes wide with fascination.
“You did. You were both in my belly, right here,” I placed my hand over my stomach, “and when it was time for you to be born, that’s how you got out.”
“Did it hurt?” Ethan asked, his face scrunched with concern.
“A little,” I admitted. “But it was worth it to get you two.”
They both leaned forward to kiss my stomach, their wet little mouths leaving damp spots on my shirt. “Thank you for bringing us out, Mama,” Alexander said solemnly.
My throat tightened with emotion. “Thank you for being my boys.”
I enjoyed taking care of my little ones. Why did I feel so uncomfortable about what happened between Thomas and Victoria? I already have so much; I shouldn’t let my emotions be controlled by these things.
But as we were getting them ready for bed–clean pajamas, teeth brushed, one last story–the questions I’d
Chapter 239 Love can hurt
been dreading finally came.
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“Mama?” Ethan said as I tucked his blanket around him. “Why was Uncle Thomas so nice to that little girl who lied?”
1 froze, my hand stilling on his covers. “What do you mean, sweetheart?”
“The girl at the party,” Alexander chimed in from his bed. “She said we pushed her, but we didn’t. She was lying.
“Why was Uncle Thomas so close to her?” Ethan pressed, his young face serious in the dim light of their nightlight. “She was a bad girl. She lied.”
I realized my children were more sensitive than I had imagined. Though they hadn’t said anything at the time, they had noticed everything. The way Victoria had touched Thomas. The way Madison had clung to him. The obvious history between them all.
“Sometimes adults have complicated relationships,” I said carefully, sitting on the edge of Ethan’s bed. “Uncle Thomas knew that little girl from before we met her.”
“But she lied about us,” Alexander said, his voice getting smaller. “And her mom was mean to you. Why does Uncle Thomas like people who are mean to you?”
The question hit me like a punch to the gut. Out of the mouths of babes.
“Uncle Thomas doesn’t like people being mean to me,” I said softly. “Sometimes grown–ups have to be polite to people even when they don’t want to be.”
“But you don’t,” Ethan observed. “You told that mean lady to go away.”
“Well, I was protecting you two,” I said. “That’s different.”
“Doesn’t Uncle Thomas want to protect us too?” Alexander asked.
I didn’t have an answer for that. Or rather, I had too many answers, none of them suitable for four–year–old ears. “Uncle Thomas cares about you very much,” I said instead. “He loves you
both.”
“But not as much as he loves that little girl,” Ethan said matter–of–factly. “We could tell.”
I stared at him, this perceptive little boy who saw far more than I gave him credit for. “What makes you say that?
“He looked at her the way you look at us,” Alexander explained. “Like she was special.”
My heart clenched. How could I explain to them that love wasn’t finite? That Thomas could care about Madison without it meaning he cared less about them?
“Love isn’t like pizza,” I said finally. “It’s not like if someone gets a piece, there’s less for everyone else. There’s always enough love to go around.”
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