When The Moon Hides Her Crown novel Chapter 152

Chapter 152 The Real Seraphina

SERAPHINA

Over the ten days, I asked myself countless times why I kissed Ronan back. How could I have crossed that line, dropped that shield and let myself slip into his possessive chains enough to lose my mind in those moments and follow his lips. I blamed my virginity that ached so badly that I acted without thinking, blamed my wolf for being lured in by his wolf in the moment of heat, blamed myself for losing self control thanks to his charm. But right now when I was pulled in his lap and heard him…talk about me kissing him that day…I realized something horrifying than I could ever have imagined.

That I kissed Ronan not of my wolf but because…….my heart…wanted…

Scared of my own realization and too frightened to even admit it, I found my eyes locked onto the intensity in his. I pulled away from his lap. I slid back as if he burnt me.

What did I just realize? It was impossible! There was no way…….

My emotions choked me as I stood up with shaking thoughts. I should not have run away that night when we kissed. I should have stopped him right there and then but now–now it had gotten to the point where I was about to weaken myself when I already had a lot to lose. My name, my title, my existence. Everything was on the line and now my heart too.

But why… why did a part of me go so insane that I blurted out, “Everyone who loves me dies. Everyone I love dies.”

A dead silence fell between us for several seconds as he stared at me blankly. “Absurd.”

I knew he wouldn’t believe me. No one ever did. “I thought it was absurd too- until the dead bodies of everyone I loved started lying before my eyes one by one. And do you know what’s funny?” I met his unchanging expression. “I saw glimpses of all their deaths.” His eyes finally shifted, the first sign of change as I revealed the truth.

I thought I would carry this secret to my grave. A grave I planned to enter alone, because I had always intended to live and die alone. No attachments. No more innocent people dying because of me. That was the way I had planned to exist. No love and no search for a soulmate like other girls–until Ronan entered my life like a storm. A storm that awakened forbidden feelings I had sworn never to feel. No matter how much I tried to avoid him, no matter how many I

faults I found in him, he always became the one my eyes searched for in secret.

Chapter 152 The Real Seraphina

But that only meant I was preparing myself for another nightmare. Because what had happened to the others might not have stopped.

That’s why I could never let myself cross that line with Ronan. The moment I did that….I would lose him. And it might mean the end of my own life too.

“Seraphina,” Ronan murmured as his hand touched my cheek.

I gasped softly under my breath, startled to find him standing right in front of me. I had been so lost in my nightmare that I hadn’t even noticed him moving closer. And then, suddenly, he pressed his lips gently to mine and whispered against them, “Did I die?”

My heart skipped a beat at his sudden action.

He looked deeper into my eyes, “Did you see a glimpse of my death?” he murmured.

I stood frozen beneath his kiss, my eyes locked on his.

“No, right?” he pressed softly. “I will not die, Seraphina. And even if one day I do, I’ll die in your arms. As your man.”

My heart clenched so painfully it felt like it might stop. Hearing him talk about his death so casually made me feel like I was the one dying.

I pulled away from his kiss and stepped back. Even after I told him about the curse following me since childhood, he still tried to hold me. He was the kind of man who didn’t even care about his own life for me. But what he didn’t understand was that if something happened to him… there would be no Seraphina left.

Just like he had said the other day.

I fought the wetness threatening my eyes and forced my heart to turn to stone.

No. I couldn’t let this happen. His madness and my weakness–the weakness of being unable to stop my heart from choosing him–would ruin us both. And now that we had come this far, neither of us needed to die.

It was enough if it was just me.

I had to stop him before it

whole. Before I lost him.

was too late. Before his obsession consumed me

S

Chapter 152 The Real Seraphina

“I did not get glimpse because i get it for only those i have feelings for,”

His eyes turned cold, “What do you mean by that? We kissed. You kissed me…”

“That kiss…” my chest rose and fell as I continued to stare into his eyes, “it was a mistake.” I forced my words out.

Dead silence fell between us before his expression darkened, “A mistake?”

I did not retreat, did not flinch when he looked even more dangerous. Instead, I stood tall and met his gaze, “Yes, I did not know my senseless act was going to make you misunderstand. I did not mean that kiss. I did not feel anything. It was just a thoughtless and foolish response on my part. Maybe a part of me was curious but that’s it,” I paused for a moment to control my wolf that was hurting more than I planned to hurt him. Then I added, “I have forgotten that kiss. So you should forget it too.”

Suddenly he burst into laughter. I secretly held my breath while watching him. How he sounded so seductive yet intimidating while laughing at what I said I had no idea. His laughter slowly died, “What? A senseless curious act? You did not feel it? I should forget it?!” He stared at me with dead blank eyes, “Tell you were joking, Seraphina?” he grabbed my arm and pulled me closer to his chest, “Tell me you are just saying all of this to push me away. Trust me I will laugh even more and forget it like I never heard it,” he whispered, his eyes looking deep into my eyes as if searching for something.

My heart squeezed, but I clenched my fists at my side and said without any emotion, “You want me to lie?”

“What?” he froze.

“Every word I said should be eye opener to you, Alpha Ronan,” I did not let my voice shake, “We crossed a line that we were never supposed to and we kissed. But that’s all. It was nothing more than that. I can not just tie myself just because of a mindless act done in the heat of the moment right?”

His eyes darted about just like his grip on my arm shook, “Stop talking like this! I know you are lying. You are scared of admitting your feelings for me…”

thim

“Scared of the feelings that don’t even exist?” I cut him off, my wolf shaken deeply by the look in his wolf’s eyes. It also affected me so badly that I felt like dying but I continued, “You as a man should know better. What you are feeling. right now is just mere attraction because I am the only woman in an all boys academy. But once you step outside this world there are countless beauties

Chapter 152 The Real Seraphina

and attractions. I am not close to them and never will be. I am just a woman who has infiltrated this male only Alpha academy to better my future. I did not come here to fall in love or find a lover, Alpha Ronan,” I declared.

He remained mute, only staring at me without blinking for a long time, “So, you don’t love me?”

My throat felt choked at his question. I replied a moment later, “No.”

The light in his eyes dimmed, “You are lying right? I know you feel the same for me.”

“I don’t,” I stated, witnessing a shift in his eyes that felt more like heartbreak, “I am here only for my crown,” I added finally, “Just a crown. And… A Crown and heart can not be held together.”

I slowly freed my arm from his. This time he did not try to grab me. A shadow fell over his eyes, making it hard for me to know what he was thinking. But the aura coming off of him was enough to make me realize how my words had affected him.

“So that is how it is?” he murmured quietly.

For some reason my heart ached at his words. Why did I feel his emotions so clearly? It hurt my wolf so badly that I found my voice choking in my throat. “Yes,” I met his dark eyes without blinking and did not my voice tremble. “So, stop following me, Alpha Ronan. Stop these crazy acts. You and I are different in every way imaginable. I have my dreams that you already might have achieved in this life. This is the difference between being born as a man and woman. You want love but I don’t have such an emotion to return to you,” I took a step back and murmured, “Because I love only myself. No one else,” I declared, taking another step back, our eyes locked as if the world around us had vanished.

However, the longer our gazes remained locked the more my heart hurt.

And before I’lost myself, I tore my eyes away and slowly turned to leave.

This was the end. Yes, I finally ended it all. It should have been this way from the beginning.

He finally got to see the real me. The real Seraphina. Selfish, and heartless Seraphina. The Seraphina that could not be loved.

But, I just did not understand why–why was my chest so tight that I felt like I

Chapter 152 The Real Seraphina

could not breathe? My lungs trembled as I walked. My wolf was restless and her emotions all over the place, that were shaking me to the bones. Pulling me into the unknown despair coming from him. What was this feeling? I felt like I was going crazy.

But I kept walking.

I forced myself not to stop. To not to look back. I knew that if I did–if I did that then…my world was really going to crumble. We would crumble.

I had to return to my world. Those fantasies and fairy tales where other women lived were not for me. I was cursed to be in hell. And now I had to return there. To the academy.

However, just as I looked up at the cliff that I had to climb, something sharp shot into my blood.

“AHHH….” a sharp voice escaped my lips as I froze in horror. The pain was so real and deadly. “What is going on?” I clenched my chest and the next second it returned sharper than before.

My knees gave out causing me to land on them with my eyes wide. My blood started growing hot like lava and skin burning as if I had been thrown into a pit of fire. With shaking limbs, I looked at Phina who was flushed red and laying selflessly inside me.

“No…” I put my shaking hand over my mouth, realizing I was in heat.

How could I go into the heat? Was it because my perfume was gone? Or was it because of….

My thoughts were interrupted when Lily’s warning rushed back in my mind. ‘The perfume relies on your wolf’s emotional stability. If you’re attracted to a man, have special feelings or if you lose control emotionally then…your heat…”

My eyes widened like an owl remembering her words. That was when…my darting eyes went to the presence right behind me.

Ronan…