Chapter 188 Four Years
Chapter 188 Four Years
ROWAN
Four years.
It has almost been four gruelling years without her.
Four years of silence, of unanswered questions, of nights where the moonlight mocked me with its silver reminder that she should have been here.
I’ve searched everywhere in Fenra, every border, every damn town that even whispered her name. But she was nowhere to be found. Not one person had seen her. Sometimes I wonder if she’d ever existed at all, or if my memory was punishing me with a ghost I could never hold again.
It hasn’t been the same since.
I buried myself in duty, because what else was left? The warriors were my lifeline now, their sweat and blood poured into the soil of our land. If I wasn’t going to find her, then at least I would build something strong enough that losing her wouldn’t feel like weakness carved into my skin.
I was training the new warriors, and it had just finished. Their bodies were bent, sweat dripping onto the dirt, weapons dull in their hands. They bowed to me with trembling spines, too tired to look up, and I inclined my head in return.
“Thank you, Alpha,” they murmured in unison, voices hoarse.
I turned on my heel. Someone rushed toward me–a young maiden, her hands cupped around a wooden flask of water. Her eyes were wide and hopeful.
I brushed her away without even meeting her gaze.
I walked out of the training grounds.
Francis caught up to me, as he always did. His arm slung around me with the casual familiarity only he could get away with.
“You don’t even want to take the water from Stacey?” he asked in disbelief. “Damn, I miss the times when you were the cheeky, charming playboy.”
I turned to glare at him.
He only laughed, unbothered by the sharpness in my eyes.
“See?” he exclaimed, grinning like a fool. “You’re too serious now! I swear, the Rowan I knew would’ve had half the maidens at the training ground swooning for a chance to hand him water. And he would’ve taken it with a wink.”
I shook my head, shaking him off. “Whatever.”
“Make sure to train them for afternoon training.”
Francis groaned loudly, tossing his head back. “Cut them some slack, will you? They’re tired. And I heard
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Chapter 188 Four Years
that aside from watching your muscles contract, the training kills them.”
I frowned, stopping mid–step.
What the hell was that supposed to mean? Watching my muscles contract?
I gave him a flat look, but Francis just shrugged, smirking, amused by my confusion.
I shook my head again, unwilling to take the bait.
“A small relaxation and we risk putting our people in danger,” I said, “Do you remember back then? Do year want rogues to enter the territory again?”
The truth was undeniable. The memory of our borders breached, of screams echoing through the trees, still lived in me. The cost of weakness was too high.
“We need to suppress them at the borders so the people don’t panic.”
Francis’s smirk faltered. He bit his lip, eyes narrowing with something that looked like regret. He clicked his tongue, but didn’t argue.
“Fine, Alpha,” he muttered.
He pulled his arm away from me.
“I’m going to eat then,” he said. “My mate’s making dessert.”
And just like that, he was back to his teasing self. He always rubbed it in my face that he had someone waiting for him in their home.
I shook my head and walked back to our house with heavy steps.
The path was familiar, but my mind wasn’t here–it was years back, on the day I graduated from Elite.
I graduated second, just right behind Arden. Elias had been third, and he was still bitter about it until now, bringing it up when we drank from time to time. On our graduation day, Arden talked to me, too. She told me that maybe Tessa didn’t want to be found. I’d been relentless before then.
Every time I thought I was close, Tessa slipped away like smoke through my fingers. I couldn’t give up. But that day… Arden’s eyes had carried something I wasn’t prepared for. She had looked like she was the one crumbling into dust, even though she was talking about Tessa. And I realized then–sometimes searching isn’t saving. Sometimes it’s just pressing salt into a wound that doesn’t want to heal.
So I stopped. Or, at least, I told myself I did.
The years that followed blurred together. I found my footing in the United Factions, taking a position on the training units. It was a respectable position. On paper, I was everything an Alpha heir should be. My father hadn’t officially passed the title to me yet, though. There was a reason for that, and it gnawed at me every time I came back here.
I stepped into our house, the familiar feeling of detachment filling my senses. My parents were in the living room, appearing like they’d been waiting for me. My stomach tightened. I already knew how this would go.
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Chapter 188 Four Years
“How is the training going?” my mother asked, her tone softer than I expected. That was another thing this unsettled ine. For the past two years, she had been different–gentler, almost tender in a way that didn’t h the woman who raised me with steel in her spine.
“Good.” I answered briefly, not meeting her eyes.
She pursed her lips, then looked away.
My father cleared his throat. “You still haven’t met your… mate?”
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